For My Mom

Who refuses to get on Facebook, but who gets upset when she doesn't get to see my statuses:

Josh and Jason dancing Livin' La Vida Loca on Just Dance 4 - best $2 spent at Redbox EVER.

I hear that flushing ice cubes down the toilet helps it to snow - what do I do to help school be open tomorrow?

::looking at forecast and banging head on the table::

Why is it that the smell of one small snack bag of burned popcorn can permeate the entire house and my clothes? Yes, my 3yo ate popcorn for breakfast - why do you ask?

Ben was rather surprised to discover that Mommy now CAN and WILL pick him up and take him to his room when he throws a tantrum - hooray for disciplining a 3yo without a cast!

Most of the time I think it is ridiculous that our home has 4 bathrooms, but everyone once in a while.......

Note to self: When the doctor says something will only burn a little bit, that really means it will burn with the fire of a million suns being injected under your skin.

Josh: I can shoot out a ray that looks like babies and the water when they cry is bombs and their poop is megabombs.  In the nature vs nurture debate, I deeply hope we can attribute this one to nature.

As the boys wrestle in the front room, I have to wonder which one will be our first ER visit of the new year?

Ben: I am a ninja snugglebunny.

'Twas 4 days til Christmas and all through the house the children were doing chores and wishing desperately that today wasn't the first day of Winter Break after all....

My life is beginning to resemble one failed Pinterest experiment after another. I am sure Jason will feel better once I finally come to terms with my lack of talent and leave that sort of thing to the professionals.

I told Jason that I want to be cremated when I die - partly so I don't end up on the wrong side of the zombie apocalypse.

Death by Christmas movies - it is a horrible way to go.

What's For Dinner?

When Josh asked Jason what was going to be for dinner tonight (A great lose-lose question - if we don't tell him, he is unhappy; if it isn't his favorite food in the world, he is unhappy), Jason told him he could make dinner.  One rule: he had to make dinner for his brothers as well.

Josh took on that challenge and microwaved up a vegetarian's nightmare/child's delight: ham and hot dogs with ketchup.  Josh took it all very seriously and made sure that his brothers' plates were made to their respective specifications (Michael no ketchup, Ben cut up with ketchup on the side) as well as cleaning up as he went.  

He was very proud of himself as he set the table, informing Michael, "I made pretty much all the food on the table."  Michael's very gratifying response: "You are so AWESOME."

Weekend

Due to illness of a horrible lingering sort, we were unable to spend Mom's birthday with her.  And since she was turning the-number-which-shall-not-be-named, I was disappointed that we missed it.  To rectify matters, we had her over this weekend for mint chocolate cake with whipped cream or ice cream (or both if the mood hit).  Actually, I made a cake last weekend too, but since no one really wants to eat week-old cake, Jason and the younger boys took care of that for me.  Two cakes in one week - yeah, we really know how to celebrate Nana's birthday, with or without her.

No less exciting than celebrating Nana's birthday was our first grilling experience.  Mom made a marinade and Jason grilled chicken.

And, I KID YOU NOT, Josh ate it.  And then asked for more.  And more.  CHICKEN IN ITS NATURAL (mostly) FORM.  I just sat at the table staring at him and said, "I am completely shocked."  At which point, Josh took another bite, looked at me and said, "I am kinda shocked myself."

I hope your weekend was as good as ours.

Judge Not

I admit - I struggle in the judging others department.  Having spent my younger years judging moms carrying around huge bags and then dragging around a monster diaper bag of my own for six years, you might think I would have learned my lesson.  But, nope.  Here is a list of people I can't help but judge:

• Meteorologists.  I am pretty sure that straight up guessing would be just as accurate as their snow predictions.  Honestly, how do you go from predicting four inches of snow to a slight drizzle?  Are we just throwing out all the options so at least one of them will be right?
• FCPS.  I don't know who makes the calendar or decides about snow days, but having had the benefit of attending school in five states I think it is all rather ridiculous.
• People who go on any sort of diatribe on Facebook who either cannot or choose not to use English grammar, spelling and fact checking.  I am not talking about the periodic auto-correct issue; I mean the kind of writing that makes an entire generation of English teachers spin in their respective graves.  Completely undermines the position being made.
• Parents who text while driving in a school zone and driving their own child to school.  While it is unlikely that there is a correlation between texting and child abuse, I still suspect it when I see a person risking his/her child's life AND MINE just to send a text.

My Day So Far

-Ben has spent a bit of time prostrate on the floor in the kitchen with his flashlight shining on the car stuck under the fridge that is so far back we can't reach it.

-Telenanny did a wonderful job watching the boys this morning as I worked on my Developmental Psychology class.  We're studying Nature vs Nurture, but I vote TV.

-Michael can't wait until his friends leave so he can exercise in the basement with his shirt off.

-The kids (all 5 of them) played "Where's the Shark?" for an hour and a half - taking turns hiding a toy shark while the rest of the group had to search for it.  The best games are the ones I get to start and then stay out of and get the dishes done.

-After six weeks of being on crutches, I finally descended into the basement.  It wasn't pretty.  (Beautifully vacuumed by my friend, but the hurricane known as my boys had attacked every surface since then.)

-The science experiment we started in the kitchen has so far proven that red food dye moves faster than blue food dye.  It was supposed to show how red and blue make purple.

-I was so exhausted this morning that all I could do was grunt and wiggle two fingers at Jason.  I think he thought I wanted him to turn off the light in the bathroom.  Really I wanted him to know that deep down under a thick layer of sleep, I was somewhat conscious and hoped he would have a good day at work.

Church Stuff

Yeah, they're stylin'.

Yesterday was the first Sunday of 2013, which meant a few things for us: church was at 1pm (hallelujah!), Ben's first Sunday in Primary (instead of nursery - our baby is getting so BIG!), Josh's first Sunday in Senior Primary (gets to go with the big kids now), and our first Sunday as Michael's teachers (in name only - we got to watch his former teachers work their magic for a day).

Things I Want To Do

Nope, these are definitely not resolutions.  Just things.

I want to do.

This year.

Which is nothing like making resolutions.

• Make a quilt.  Our house is a little chilly, so we can't ever have enough blankets.  I made one years ago with t-shirts and jeans and it is the perfect weight, but I didn't make it long enough for a human adult.  I have some old jeans and a closet full of cloth from projects Mom someone didn't make and Mom's a sewing machine, so I cut up a bunch of squares and started sewing them together today.
• Stop saying the word "crap" in front of the boys.  Don't want to get all carried away and stop saying it altogether, but I need to stop saying words in front of them that I am not comfortable with them saying at school.  Or church.  
• Send birthday cards to family.  
• Get back off of dairy and sugar.  I've cheated a little during the Christmas break and I have been paying for it.
• Learn to swim.  This will most likely be my exercise of choice once the cast comes off, but I am afraid of the water.  As in I have considered getting snorkel gear to swim in the local pool, but I would still keep my eyes closed even with the goggles on because I feel anxiety when I can see how deep the pool is.
• No more fractures.